The business world is a stupid place. We would all be better off living in caves and scavenging in forests.
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It's Batman vs. Superman in the digital age
Asking a web designer to fix your computer is like asking a taxi driver to service your car.
It's a planet Jim but not as we know it
The idea of exploring the final frontier in a galaxy far, far away is all jolly nice and all that if only space wasn't such a big problem.
Please hold. Your call is important to us
An afternoon of fun and games shouting at a Leprechaun whilst listening to classical music on my phone.
I don't want to be wired for sound
If using a mobile phone is supposed to give me a brain tumour, does that mean I'll develop testicular cancer if I carry it around in my pocket?
Survival of the weakest
Maybe it won’t be the computers that rise up and take over after all. Perhaps customers will kill off all intelligent life first.
In the words of Lady Gaga...
When I'm writing an algebraic equation whilst simultaneously learning Latin and playing chess, the last thing I want to do is speak to you.
My computer will be the death of me
I really don’t want to sound like one of these doomsayers but I’m sure my iPhone is going to murder me horribly in my sleep.
Warning, using Amazon may cause blindness
Let's face it, if the Beatles were around today they would not have achieved the same success with the song 'Kindle writer'.
Death of the English language
How bad has education become that a bloke who didn't pick up a book until he was 20 is writing an article educating people on grammar?
A lesson on surviving in the business world
Embellishment, talking bollocks and a pretentious nature are key to ensuring a long and successful career in the modern age.
Returning after these short messages
Sending a subliminal message to all advertisers out there: Stop wasting your money on pointless TV ads. Advertise on Google and earn me some money!
We've got to stop meeting like this
Strategic planning, stop for coffee and then end with a string of clichés before actively contemplating suicide. Welcome to the board!
Apple not allowing Flash to take a bit out of it
For all you millions of geeks out there who are waiting for the iPhone to incorporate Flash, you are wasting your time.
Forgive me, I am below contempt
I've been called lots of things in my time, from arrogant to ugly. Still, things could be worse; I could be a consultant!
Taking a wizz at Liverpool Street Station
To pee or not to pee; that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous charges, or to take arms against extortionists and, by opposing, end them.
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